catherineldf | Entries tagged with personal update

Sunday morning, I got up, dealt with necessary kitty things, drank my keffir (my homemade goat's milk yogurt never really solidifies, but is other wise good), and went back to bed with Shu for snuggle time. Then got up again, made breakfast, started the dishes...and had a pipe break under the sink, cascading water down into the remains of Jana's studio in the basement. Frantic scrambling ensued and I managed to get everything moved or tossed and a tub under the sink for the time being, but it all took awhile.

And so far this week, I've had my annual physical (went well), my annual eye exam (went fine, but need new glasses again, which was spendy) and had a project fall through, which isn't surprising as I and the other party want different things, but I am annoyed at having my time wasted. I'll have to deal with that tomorrow, along with its related permutations. Added to that, the plumber comes on Thursday to deal with the pipe and the electrician/plumber comes on Friday to cap the gas and set up for the new washer and dryer, which will be great, but a lot.

But apart from all that, I've done a couple of fun events, one being 13 Gears Steampunk, which I always enjoy, and the other being the first HerStory Book Fair at the Midtown Global Market, which is an indoor international market in Minneapolis with lots of small restaurants, crafts and events. The other authors were very enthusiastic and I had some fun chats with folks. And it's nice that some of the vendors remember me - Jana and I were in there a lot right after it reopened after the riots in 2020. A lot of the folks who own businesses there also live in the building and they had to defend it so they're very, very committed to being there and we wanted to support them as much as we could. So lots of takeout, grocery shopping and so forth. It's harder to make time now since I have to juggle all the house stuff, plus events and Shu's shot schedule, but it was nice to see it really hopping again.

My containers for container gardening are starting to show up. I'm going to try growing potatoes, tomatoes, lettuce, carrots, herbs and the starter onion my neighbor gave me. I'm also dutifully reading a book on container gardening in hopes of being successful enough at it that I can share food. I'm looking at participating in the neighborhood garage sale as well in order to move a solid chunk of Jana's memory care furniture and some other sundries out from underfoot.

And the rest of this week will include a trip to the Women's Club of Minneapolis for a evening of "Song to the Moon": music, poetry and watching the moon rise from the roof with my friend Julia. Since we met there at the Jane Austen Society meetings, it seems appropriate that we return, especially since the Women's Club is in danger of closing due to a combination of unmet expenses, reduced funding and so forth. It is a grand old pile with a lot of history and I hope there's a deus ex machina to save it. On Friday night, a friend is taking me to "Spellbound," a new play by a new queer theater company at the Phoenix Theater, and on Saturday night, another friend is taking me to the Mysterious Old Radio Listening Society at Crooner's.

Around all of that, I'm trying to do some useful things, but I think I'll also need to take Sunday as a recovery day and just deal with my gigantic to-do list as well as getting some writing done.

Still can't announce about the award, alas. Writers, keep your contact info up to date and check it occasionally! Do it for the team, if nothing else.

I'm making progress on Jana's memorial and will post about it when we settle on a date. it will take place at the Open Book in Minneapolis, where the Minnesota Center for Book Arts is located.

Apart from that, I am still employed, despite recent reorgs. I do get to shift to an even worse manager for a while though, which I could very much do without. I have also come to the conclusion that the 20+ year old washer and dryer are not long for this world so this Friday, I get an estimate on whether or not the aging hookups can be converted for a heat pump dryer and a new washer. Fingers crossed on that. My experiments with induction cooking on the hot plate are going well and I am continuing to very slowly clear things out of the house. I am also looking at taking up container gardening because I know I'm not up for the full scale garden beds, weeding, et al. I am looking at my 62nd birthday in a couple of weeks and I want to be as realistic as possible about where I and things are at.

I have also been reaching out to Congress, sending money when I can and so forth. I also signed up for Elders Climate Action, which is a national group that does awareness, conservation, education, lobbying and protests, which I figured was a nice broad range that I could plug myself into. Other things under consideration: rejoining the Unitarian Universalist Society and rejoining the Society for Creative Anachronism. This is by way of checking out communities where friends are involved and are recommending them to me. Given how things are, more community is much better than less. Also, more art. Been trying to make it to a concert or a play with friends every week, which has been delightful.

In other news, Point of Hearts (Astreiant #6) by Melissa Scott comes out from Queen of Swords Press on Thursday 3/20! And Books 1-5 are on sale on our website through tomorrow 3/19.

It's been a lively two and a half weeks. I'm starting to get my arms around things. Jana's death certificate showed up yesterday so I'm tackling life insurance, just sent off her obituary to the Cremation Society (need to do the newspaper one next) and getting other odds and ends in motion. I have to update beneficiaries and I got an appointment to go by the DMV and get her name taken off the car title. Still have to wrangle one last credit card and shutting down the last of her social media, but her ashes are residing on the entertainment center and her memorial brick is being carved as we speak. Picking out photos has been hard. People asking me when the memorial will be has been harder, but discussions are in the works and I should have that ironed out on Friday. But even with planning, this has been a lot.

What else have I been up to? Day job continues slogging along for the moment, at least. I went and sold books at TC Pride's Queer Writes Romance Book Fair with Alexa and saw some friends and had a fine time. A friend took me to my first heavy metal concert (Apocalyptica/Nita Strauss at the Uptown) and it was pretty fun, once I decided to stand in the back away from the strobe lights and smoke machine. I went to go see "The Root Beer Lady" at the History Theatre with a different friend; this was a one woman show about Dorothy Molter, the last nonindigenous person to be allowed to live in the Boundary Waters. She was quite fascinating - check out the link. We got Jana's room cleaned out at memory care and I've started rehoming stuff. I did some necessary financial planning things. My cat sitter came by to learn how to give Shu his insulin shot so now I have a backup person. I went to a panel by the MN Legislature's Queer Caucus at Queermunity (the new LGBTQ+ community center) on Monday night and felt a bit more heartened (and Roseville folks, vote for David Gottfried!). Apart from that, been reaching out to my electeds, donating where I can and supporting good local things. So mostly hanging in, if wildly stressed on bad days. How about you?

So, in the interval in which I did not go see Jana (last entry) and when I intended to, hospice reached out and said they think she is at end game. I went and sat with her for a while on Tuesday afternoon. She slept the whole time, but I gather she woke up briefly when her former PCA, now a hospice volunteer, stopped by. The hospice staff says she's been sleeping most of the time this week. I'm going by tomorrow and Sunday this weekend to sit with her. I read to her when she wakes up, but that's not very often. At this point, she's heavily medicated and seems relatively comfortable so I'm hoping she passes in her sleep very soon.

How do I feel about this? On most levels, I'm ready for her to move on. I think it will hit me eventually, but I've done a lot of my grieving as she disappeared. I hope that her spirit moves on to something better for her.

Shu (boy kitty) is handling the shots well, although I'm finding the schedule challenging sometimes. I've started working with my cat sitter to teach her how to give shots so I can get the occasional break. They're 16 year old cats now though, and he's lost weight and muscle mass so I don't really know what his prospects are.

I did two self-care things this week - a darning class at The Curiosity Studio and a visit from Costco's contractors to remove the 19 broken window blinds and install new ones and I love them so very much. the house looks very different and I did some overdue cleaning and clearout, both of which made me feel better. Last weekend, I finished reviewing 26 grant proposals (some of which were terrific) and completed and submitted my first brand new story in 2 years. I'm working on some other projects, plus Queen of Swords Press, but I'm definitely getting back to writing.

I can say nothing about the world situation that others haven't already said. I've been emailing my congress people, signing petitions, donating and supporting organizations and people in my own communities as much as I can. And that's what I've got for now.

I am making progress on some things, despite having a hellacious cold.

Had a great time going to see "Escape from New York" at the Parkway Theater on Thursday. Also, kudos to the Parkway for their "Host Your Wedding" ad campaign which features "Rick and John's Wedding Here" in prominent letters on their marquee.
Am almost done reviewing all 26 grant proposals, many of which are amazing. Lots of great stuff coming down the pike, Twin Cities folks.
I'm 3000 words into my new story and really liking it.
Shu seems to be doing slightly better and is a bit livelier (kitty diabetes - 2 shots per day)
I went to an interesting talk about textile waste, recycling and creating circular market here in Minnesota that reduce waste at The Great Northern our local festival of art and climate change, on Saturday. Then I went to a mending workshop right afterward and successfully patched up a work shirt and one of my house clogs.
After that, we were off to The Phoenix Theater for a production of Patricia Wrede's "Dealng With Dragons." It was a delight!
Sunday, I thought I had a crochet workshop at StevenBe's, my local gay-owned yarn shop, but it turned out that I got the date wrong. The nice man at the counter penciled me in for next Sunday though, so it will hopefully work out.
My friend Matt came over for pizza and the continued watching of "Witchblade," a series I never got to see when it aired but am now viewing thanks to the gift of dvds from a friend. First season was pretty brilliant!
Did not go see Jana this weekend, but will next weekend, cold permitting.
Apart from that, have done donations and membership renewals, contacted Congress about various things, poked Target about being stupid asshats, prepped some donations and giveaways and continued working my way through my prep list. I have supplies on hand for a lot of basic things, so now I'm doing wacky stuff like acknowledging that I went 3 days without power last summer and that is likely to be longer and/or more frequent. On their way: a solar-powered lantern that doubles as a charger for devices from LuminAid, a company that helps with light sources after disasters, and a battery-powered portable cooler that can be charged via standard plugin or solar (once you get the setup - I'm going battery only for now) from a company in the L.A. area in part because that's where they're made and in part because they'll need all the help the rest of us can muster. I figure I can help myself and my neighbors as needed with these.

More stuff in the works - stay tuned!

So Hell Boss, after making a layoff list and showing it off to a person or two and doing sundry other unhinged things, all of which pointed to layoffs, suddenly did a pivot and offered me a permanent position. 2 months ago, I would have taken it. However, the offer came couched in exactly the same terminology that she used when I asked her why she had fired Scrum Master #2 (we’re on #4 since last April when I started) and experience has taught me that any boss who equates “team participation” with being servile is not one I can work for. My days would be numbered at the outset and frankly between my dying wife, my sick cat and the political situation, I’m out of spoons for dealing with extra crazy. Will I regret it? Probably. Would I regret hiring on even more? Also probably. And yes there could be a chance of transferring if I hired on, but I’ve been told explicitly that I’m not “allowed” to talk to other teams and she badmouths all of us on the regular, from the snippets I’ve heard. So vanishingly unlikely. Still employed today, will go on discussing job options and looking about and having a more serious look at retraining. One foot in front of the other, step by step.

What else am I doing? Reviewing 26 arts grant proposals for a local organization for a small stipend. So far, so good. Currently completing my favs and then going through my other yeses, maybes and nos. Some amazing BIPOC and queer art projects in the hopper! I’m also working on a new pirate/spy in the 17th century Caribbean story and making good progress.

Other than that, I made an appointment for a free energy audit to look for more ways to make the house a tad less drafty. We had one about 20 years ago, so it’s time. I sold some more of Jana’s tools and supplies to a local artist. I’m looking at upgrading my convection oven to a new model that will further reduce my reliance on the gas stove. Next up, looking at a single induction burner for same. I’d love to replace the stove but all the repiping and changes were super spendy when last I checked it out, not to mention the cost of the stove so baby steps. I’m also reorganizing my finances to make it easier to access funds and to organize my estate planning. And adding events for this year! Stay tuned on that. I’m also trying to do 1 or 2 things every day to support queer folks, women who didn’t vote for this hellscape, BIPOC and immigrants folks in the same bucket. Everything is very budget-dependent so a healthy chunk is things like spending my money at better places, renewing memberships and upping monthly pledges a bit, but doing what I can at the moment. More to come!

The year is off to a quite a start. In order as I noted them, not in order of importance:

1. New story progressing nicely, as is getting ducks in a row for next Queen of Swords Press title. Next up, scheduling events and such.
2. Speaking of which, new Queen of Swords Press title, Point of Hearts (Astreiant #6) by Melissa Scott is up for preorder! This is the brand new Astreiant novel that we'll be releasing on 3/20!
3. Tune in tomorrow (1/18) around noon for Madame Askew Sips the Tea, featuring me! It will be featured on Madame's YouTube channel in a few days. Always a delight!
4. Starting in on the gigantic pile of grant reviews (26!) I have due next month. Yes, this is a (small) paying gig).
5. My beloved big boy kitty, Shu, got sick around Christmas and has been diagnosed with kitty diabetes. 2 shots a day and we are trying to get him stable. He's still pretty listless and has pronounced neuropathy. But everything else is pretty normal for him and he doesn't seem to be in pain so fingers crossed that he makes a full recovery.
6. Jana is fading. She's had a couple of ministrokes and is now being described as "nonresponsive" with some regularity. Yes, there is a DNR. I'm going to check on her this weekend; the nursing assessment is that it's weeks, not months, before she passes.
7. I'm getting window treatments from Costco. But why, you ask? Because all of the 19 ancient vinyl blinds in the house are broken. Jana attempted to repair them and toward the end, would do things like nail them into the window frame. Many of them have to be custom cut because 100+ year old house with many, many windows. I have tried to deal with it on my own and I just cannot. So Costco has a deal with a company in Wisconsin that comes in and does an assessment and gives you an estimate (more reasonable than you'd think) and that is now complete, so next month I get fake wood blinds that the cats can't break. And an insulating curtain for the always freezing walk-in bedroom closet, which is also the entrance to my attic office. Am excited. At this point, this is about my mental health as much as anything else.
8. A friend is taking me to the symphony tomorrow night to listen to a concert about Nordic folklore and another friend is hosting me for a Russian-style tea at her house on Sunday afternoon.
9. More house projects on tap soon. I'm trying to do everything I can while I'm still working and before prices go nuts.
10. Day job continues to be crappy. Have asked my company to look for another gig because the toxicity is starting to dent me.
11. A reminder to fandom in general that a whole lot of people knew NG to one extent or another. I had dinner with him once and shared a whole bunch of friend and colleague circle overlap with him. I knew he had treated some of his partners poorly and done some crappy things. The horrors in that article were a whole new level, however, and I had no idea it was that BAD. Don’t make assumptions about who knew what when or conversely, hold forth about how you just know he’s innocent because he said so in a blog post. I have friends close to the situation and nothing I’ve seen or heard so far suggests that we’re done with it. This stance will absolutely not age well.
12. And the shit hits the fan on Monday. I'm still stocking up and planning and getting things I will need now. Will it be enough? Almost certainly not. But I will do the best I can and help good folks when and where I can. That said, all those who voted for this shitshow because they wanted to watch others suffer? Gonna eat popcorn and not lift a finger for them.

More coherent posts soon. Maybe, Had 2 migraines this week and had to work anyway so am not at my best.

Let's take "please, for the love of all you love, vote tomorrow if you haven't already" as a given. I voted several weeks ago by mail and have confirmed that my ballot was received. I have donated and gone to a couple of online benefits, but just did not have calling or door knocking in me right now. Thank you so much to all of you who did this and more!

What have I been up to? Persuading hospice to not give Jana highly addictive painkillers (they settled on something less scary) . She's eating a bit more, but is otherwise asleep the vast majority of the time. When she is awake, she's really out of it. Going on to pack up her bed so they could move in a hospital bed felt kind of cruel, but had to be done. Otherwise, whenever I see her, she sleeping. I do get lots of regular reports from hospice though so we're into the wait and see period.

What else have I been up to? I read Grief is a Sneaky Bitch by Lisa Keefauver and thought it was well-written and useful. I replaced the giant dining room table and broken chairs with new and smaller models that better fit the space (and are marvelous and I love them). I gave away the old table and chairs and Jana's bed from memory care to people who needed them so that was nice. I've been doing some cool first time ever things: a trip to Minnesota Zoo for the Jack o' Lantern Spectacular in the rain was an unexpected delight; went to a Boiled in Lead concert at the Celtic Junction Arts Center; checked out a new breakfast restaurant, Fusion Pancake, this last weekend; and discovered Roseville's small Arboretum and walking trails around the nature preserve. I went to plays at Open Eye Theater and Park Square Theatre and saw a cool art show at the American Swedish Institute. I went to the new queer community center, Queermunity, for a Bridgerton Ball. I watched "Casablanca" for the first time in years. I finished my first new piece of writing for submission in a year and a half. I have spent time with friends who I haven't seen for a while as well as those I see regularly.

Am I okay? More or less? Freaked out about the election, sometimes lonely, wrangling work stuff, getting things done around the house and hanging out with the cats so about as normal. And on that note, I need to head to bed. Sending all the warm fuzzies I can spare out to those of you who need them right now! "Let's fucking go!" and all that!

So the big update is that I "won" the Hospice War. After a couple of weeks of her sleeping almost nonstop and being generally unresponsive to most things, I signed the paperwork and my partner of 28 years, wife for 15 of those, has been moved into hospice care. She's asleep most of the time, as far as I can tell, both from my visits and talking to staff. Hospice got her a new, fancier wheelchair today, one big enough to sleep in, and on Friday, I'm going back with one of my friends to take apart her bed so they can put in a hospital bed and a lift. There's a DNR and she's in the "just keep comfortable" category. This is a...lot. No idea how long this will be, but I hope it's quick for her sake. I think she's just done.

Other things that could be going better right now: Queen of Swords Press did not win an Innovative Voices Award. Or the small business grant I applied for. Worse, I found out a friend of mine died in July and I didn't see it until last week. Harriet Culver was an awesome human, a friend of both my mother's and mine, and I shall miss her. If you went to WisCon, 4th Street or other bookish cons before 2020, you probably met her. Wicked smart, good sense of humor, lovely human. Sigh.

On a brighter note, Queen of Swords Press authors in North Carolina were not clobbered by Hurricane Helene and my friends in Asheville have either safely evacuated or are doing reasonably well with support from their communities. Best wishes sent to everyone in Milton's path too.
More bright spots:

Point of Dreams (Astreiant #3) by Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett is out everywhere tomorrow (10/10)!
The audiobook of my novel Silver Moon is on sale for the next couple of weeks. The narrator is really good! I've been listening to it on CD to ground myself in the third book, Blue Moon, and recently realized that I started in the wrong place and the wrong character for the book I should be writing. this will be good in the long run and I'm listening to the audiobooks while I drive back and forth to check on Jana and thinking about them a lot.
I have made tiny bits of progress on my Joanna Russ essay and plan to dig in this weekend.
I bought myself a new bed with a spiffy new mattress for back pain and a frame that raises and lowers. I love it and I hurt less.
I decided that I was not going to live with dining room chairs that are gradually disintegrating (Jana was keeping them glued together when she was doing better) and a table that was too big for the dining room. I gave the latter to a nice neighbor for his mom last night and am shedding the chairs in time for the new dining room set to arrive next week.
I have found a massage therapist who I like and am starting to see regularly.
I am working on spending more time with friends, asking for help and resting when I can. I'm even reading a self-help book on grieving and liking it so far - Grief is a Sneaky Bitchy by Lisa Keefauver.
The squirrels have randomly planted cherry tomatoes all over the yard and thanks to freakish hot dry spell we're having, I'm getting really good cherry tomatoes every other day. Which is fundamentally wrong for October in this climate, but tasty.
I am "touching grass" as much as possible and doing what good I can in the world at the moment.

Good thoughts appreciated, though!

Namely, this last week.

This will be rough - please skip if you’re not in a place for rough end of life/dementia stuff.

It kicked off with my discovery that Jana had been refusing to get out of bed and wouldn’t eat or drink for a couple of days. And it was not the first time, though the previous time had been about a day in length. Her regular PCA (the one I pay to check on her) was of the opinion that it was time to look at hospice care and we brought in the social worker I pay to guide me through the maelstrom for a confirmation. She met with the staff and then she and I had a very upsetting (to me) conversation about time, money and energy, none of which I possess in great abundance after the last few years and how I “could keep her going” if I just did more. So she is currently nonverbal (except for the word “coffee”) or makes random noises, has no interest in books, most music, conversation, art on screen, art in books and minimal interest in TV, which she can’t process, far as I can tell. Even her PCA is having trouble getting her to engage at all in the crafts that she still loved months ago. Visits are an absolute torment for me at this point, which is why I keep her PCA on (also so there’s additional advocacy for her). I can’t take her out, originally due to her being “a flight risk” and now because I’m worried that she’ll fall. Gosh, yes, let’s “keep her going” because you see her every 6-8 months and just “know” that she’s still in there. At any rate, I was very clear about what I could do and could not do and explained emotional, physical and financial burnout in fairly brutal terms. I talked to her CADI social worker the next day and got a much more affirming response about where she’s at (closer to hospice than my advisor thinks). But the long and short of it is that she apparently has to stop eating long enough for it to be recognized as a problem and then I can get her assessed for hospice. I am not thrilled, but there’s nothing more I can do at the moment because she’s in the midst of a “rally” right now and therefore “fine.” Dementia sucks pointy rocks.

Anyway, so that’s where that’s at for the moment. On a brighter, cheerier note, Queen of Swords Press, my little queer science fiction, fantasy and horror press, is a finalist for the Independent Book Publishers Association’s Innovative Voices publishing program! It comes with mentorship, discounts and access to a bunch of things we are still too small to afford at this stage. In short, it could really help us level up. That said, they announce the 5 winners next week and the company we’re in is pretty stellar so please keep your fingers crossed for us!

I was hoping to have the next volume, Point of Dreams, in the Astreiant Series created by Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett out this month, but we had way too many shenanigans so pushing that out until 10/10. Preorders will go up this weekend around Columbia Heights Pride, where we will be tomorrow, and St. Cloud Pride, where my wonderful assistant Alexa will be peddling our books while I deal with other things. Onward and upward, as they say.

Starting with the least pleasant one. Jana has deteriorated a lot in the last few months. She is rapidly becoming nonverbal and is having increasing motor control issues. It is next to impossible to talk to her, at least for me, and it's breaking what's left of my heart in that regard. This disease can absolutely fuck off into the sun.

Okay, that said, I'm doing some things for self-care. My current day job contract is also rife with unpleasantness so this is beyond essential.

I went to a bed store on Lake Street on Sunday and bought a new bed, one both fancy and on sale. It is fabulous and I also got a bed base that can be adjusted at the head and the feet. I have been in constant pain from my hip and leg for over a year now (there are good days and bad days) and I have a more pronounced limp and a harder time getting up if I sit too long. My sleep is wildly irregular. Our bed is nearly 25 years old and the mattress is at least 10 so it was past time. I lay on the sample bed in the store chatting up the sales guy while I played with the controls and for five glorious minutes, nothing hurt. Shows up next weekend and I am very excited.
I acquired an awesome tea pot with a cephalopod on it, also on sale.
I have made time for writing (next werewolf novel has cleared 10k words on this draft) and I am working on a new Joanna Russ-related project that I'll announce soon.
I am walking more and trying to remember to stretch.This worked well last week when my power was out for 2 days and the car was sealed in the garage. I walked a lot of places.
Next up: buying a new, more ergonomic office chair.
Seeing a massage therapist this week and continuing with my weekly online movement class with Cassandra Shore,
Doing some of the end of life planning stuff that I need to tackle. I realize that this isn't self care for everyone, but it is for me.
Calming my schedule where I can so I have more time for rest and friends. I'm going to hear the Tannahill Weavers at the Cedar this week, among other things.

Also this weekend, I tabled at the inaugural Carver County Pride with author Abra Staffin-Wiebe and had a fine time. We even had one of the semi-mythical "I'll take one of everything" book shoppers. It's happened to me once before in person and it is the BEST. Anyway, lovely weather, good event, nice people, would do again.

I put out a new-to-us novella though Queen of Swords Press last week. Point of Knives (Astreiant #2) by Melissa Scott answers the big question: when are Nico and Philip going to get together? Oh, and solve a murder mystery? Great stuff! :-)

Look for Michael Merriam and me at the Queen of Swords Press booth at Pagan Pride at Minnehaha Falls this Saturday, if you're local. And more to come.

Bit of a whirlwind last couple of weeks. I went to GCLS in St. Paul last weekend. I had originally intended to stay all weekend, but that was before I decided to go to Glasgow Worldcon. So I cut it down to 2 days, just vending, nothing else, masked the whole time, apart from eating at my table in the hallway by myself. It was kind of dull and not much fun, but I dodged the wave of COVID that went through the con and did have some nice chats with fans of the werewolf books and caught up a bit with some friends. What I did not dodge was an unpleasant stomach bug that hit this week and took me out for a few days. And the endless rain that we've been having came with bonus thunderstorms on the weekend, so no sooner did I get through the stomach issues and the resulting no sleep, it was Migraine City. Good times!

And that was just my personal stuff. I did fit in a quick trip to the Trylon Microcinema for a viewing of "Blithe Spirit" (1945) on Saturday night, between crises, which was fun. Ended up going by my self because my friend had a family emergency and I wasn't sure that I wasn't going to be too sick to go, but had a nice time and ran into a friend outside who was there for the late show. Sunday, was a cats on the couch, forget moving day. Which is not great considering that I'm leaving the country soon and have a friend coming to stay with the kitties, which means cleaning and excavation and such. I did manage a burst of energy today, which resulted in day jobbery, a small business grant application completed under the wire and a COVID booster. Go, me!

How do I feel about this week's bigger than Me news? Well, I think that President Biden did the right thing. And I am pretty excited to support VP Harris, neither one of which should surprise anyone too much.

Meanwhile, scrambling to get stuff done, including getting Melissa Scott's Point of Knives (Astreiant #2) up for preorder, just sent someone an acceptance letter (announcement if they accept, once the contract is dry!) and am running two book sales through the end of the month.

Pick up our entire backlist at Smashwords now through 7/31.
Pick up most of our books, including Point of Hopes and Terror at Tierra de Cobre on sale at DriveThruFiction through 7/31.

Now to do some odds and ends and get to bed early since there's a release at work this week on top of everything else.

So I survived Queen of Swords Press's first venture into Twin Cities Pride last weekend. For some idea of the scale of that, estimated attendance was 600,000 over the course of two days, which makes it the biggest outdoor event in Minnesota with the exception of the State Fair...which runs for two weeks. From a vendor perspective, we put in a minimum of 2 10 hour days, plus setup on Friday, including time spent hauling stuff back and forth from parking (by utility cart, in my case). It was a LOT and I could not have done it without help. Big shoutout to Michael Merriam, Alexa Garber, Matt Coe, Jody Wurl and Lauri Holm, who spelled me at the table, peddled books, helped me haul things and so forth. The weather was perfect, the people were lovely and apart from some snafus with the vendor setup, I had a fine time and good sales.

Big shoutout to everyone who participated in the Pride StoryBundle this year! We raised around $450 for Rainbow Railroad and it all went reasonably well, given that we are all scattered like whoa this summer.
Apart from that, I currently have 2 signed books, Silver Moon and Blood Moon, in the Romancing the Vote Auction, which ends tomorrow. The book package will include goodies from the International Wolf Center in Ely, MN so I think you should check it, as well as the other auction items, if you can. Lots of great stuff out there and I believe it's broken all their previous records in raising funds for organizations fighting voter suppression. Queen of Swords Press is also having a big backlist sale on Smashwords for the Summer/Winter Sale and there are many deals to be had.

Today, I'm sitting around with cats and moving very slowly through my to-do list. Not sleeping well due to comforting the cats--I truly hate local fireworks. Sigh. Now off to go cook dinner and then watch things, possibly while not working.

Some of it quite good, some less so, as is the norm. My hip pain seems to have calmed down for a bit and I'm going to see a bodyworker after Pride and see what is to be done longer term. I got extended on my work contract just in time for work to get wildly stressful. Sigh. I have successfully purchased and assembled a new and more stable coat rack, which is less likely to fall over and land on people when they hang up coats on it. I have organized 2 boxes of hazardous waste to be taken to the dropoff on Saturday. I have finished my editing pass on Fairs' Point (Astreiant #4) and sent it to Melissa for review. I completed and turned in an application for the Independent Book Publisher Association's Innovative Voices program (send good thoughts on this one, please!).

And I went to 4th Street Fantasy last weekend, where I got to hang out with delightful friends I haven't seen in far too long. Our panel went reasonably well and there was some interesting discussion. A friend and I swooped in and whisked Lois McMaster Bujold off to lunch after her interview, which was very pleasant. Making a sidebar note, however, to suggest that if 4th Street is going to have invited guests, a guest liaison would be a good idea. Lois was quite left alone after her interview, once she finished signing books, except for my friend and I, and someone a bit more official should have been keeping an eye on things, in my humble. But lovely to hear her and see her work celebrated, so there's that.

Apart from that, I'm trying to do one new to me thing a month and one thing that I haven't done since before lockdown. This month, that's Drag Brunch at LUSH, which was delightful, and a trip to the Walker for the Keith Haring show this weekend.

This weekend features multiple events!
I'm getting interviewed by the delightful Madame Askew for her "Sip the Tea" Show on Saturday at noon - it will be streamed on FB.
Death by Silver by Melissa Scott and Amy Griswold is a finalist for the Midwest Book Awards on Saturday night. I'll be there to cheer and hope!
Sunday, it's breakfast with friends and off to the Keith Haring show, then the wonderful Temporal Textural Virtual Book club discussion of Death by Silver on Sunday night. Melissa and I should both be there so we hope you'll join us.

There are also book sales!
Smashwords presale on Point of Hopes by Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett (Astreiant #1) is up! The book will be out from Queen of Swords Press on 6/27.
There are 4 Queen of Swords Press titles on sale at Amazon this weekend for the latest I Heart Sapphic Sale - look for Silver Moon, The Language of Roses by Heather Rose Jones, Murder on the Titania by Alex Acks and Desire by Emily Byrne for the "Beach Reading Sale."
The Pride StoryBundle is running until 7/1 - 13 great books and a chance to support Rainbow Rainroad! Also, not coincidentally, a big chunk of Queen of Swords Press's annual operating budget so please consider picking a bundle up.
And finally, Audiobooks.com is offering a great deal on the Silver Moon audiobook to celebrate it's one year anniversary!

And next weekend, please look for us at Pride in Loring Park in Minneapolis. Queen of Swords Press will be in the Queer Writes tent with a whole lot of books. :-)

It's late May and I already feel like this has been a year already. Last week's "fun" involved a Denial of Service attack on the Queen of Swords Press website. It took about 4 hours for me to get in and get it stopped because the flood of spam from a server in Moldova kept crashing things, but I did eventually get things locked down. Eventually, I'll fix the Contact Form so it works again, but I thought I'd give it a week or so for things to settle down. The rest of the week was less dramatic, but I'm already behind and scrambling to get caught up, so it didn't help. :-(

This weekend was mostly good. I miss the hell out of being at WisCon and it feels very weird to be in town. I had a lot of ouch (the weather has been exciting), but also a fun couple of short plays with Jody Wurl at the Crane Theater, a delightful trip to the Minnesota Streetcar Museum with Michael Merriam as part of my "do things I've never done locally plan," a lovely breakfast with Caroline Stevermer and a very nice hot beverage with Jennie Goloboy at a new-to-me coffee place. I also visited Jana and she basically told me to leave, so that was fun. She's getting on better with her PCA these days than me so I keep getting her checked on every week. Less frustrating for me and likely more useful for her.

Apart from that, it's all errands and terrifying meetings about Twin Cities Pride. I somehow missed the memo that it's now over 500k attendees and it will be our first year as a vendor. There's so much stuff to deal with! I'm a freaked. But that said, come see us in the Queer Writes tent in Loring Park next to the bridge to the Sculpture Garden! I will have books and such!

June also features a whole lot of other stuff (see pinned post above) so there will be other opportunities to see me and my authors. In other news, Kate Larking, who some of you know from Sirens Con days, has spun up her own marketing and publicity biz. I'm looking to bring her on to help me tackle some things I have dropped the ball on, like juicing up our backlist and getting things linked together more sensibly for cross promotion. Let me know if you need a contact for her - she also helps organize Kickstarters, coaches in person bookselling and sundry other related tasks. In addition to that, I'm applying for the Independent Book Publisher's Association Innovative Voices Program. It's a "leveling up" mentorship and grant program for indie publishers and I'm very pleased that Betsy Miller of Thinking Ink Press, one of last year's recipients, has agreed to recommend us. Now to come up with something more coherent than, "OMG! We're publishing the entire Astreiant Series by Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett, plus a new novella this year!" to say about us.

Oh, and hey, the Pride StoryBundle launches on 5/31! Stay tuned!

As always, more soon.

Queen of Swords Press News first!
Big shoutout to Melissa Scott and Amy Griswold! Death by Silver is a 2024 Midwest Book Award Finalist!

And, speaking of Melissa Scott, Point of Hopes: A Novel of Astreiant (Book 1) is up for preorder on the Queen of Swords Press webstore and elsewhere! Look for Book 2, Point of Knives, in July and the other books every month after that, on through to a brand new novella in the series in December!

We have been scrambling to get Hopes done for months now. Between Melissa, cover artist Matt Bright and me, we have weathered: 2 cases of COVID, a major move, 3 job changes, multiple events and a major car accident. But we have perservered and it is gorgeous! Preorders will be trickling out into the world in the next few weeks. We also have review copies!

Otherwise, just a tad buried under tasks and work and such. If you're in or near Rochester, MN, stop by Rochester Pride this weekend and say hi to us (Queen of Swords Press will have a table). I've even got a couple of new writing projects, in addition to the next werewolf novel. More news to come!

Okay, weekend road trip with friends.But I didn't do any work so therefore it = vacation. What did we do? Went to Wisconsin! Some years back, my friend Matt and I met an older gay man from Alma, WI who was running an ice cream shop/hotel on Alma's main drag. He had brochures featuring photos of a glorious garden and was a big promoter of all things Alma. In addition to his own Hotel de Ville and Fire & Ice (the ice cream coffee shop), Alma is the home of the glorious Castlerock Museum, which has a great collection of historical arms. Plus art galleries, little art shops, an old theater and such. I have been desperately wanting to go stay at this hotel for ages - Jana and I made it to town to check out the museum and ice cream shop pre-COVID lockdown, but weren't able to get time to stay there. Achievement unlocked! It is a charming old pile, full of antiques and history and we enjoyed our time there. The garden is a marvel (statuary! a waterfall! a fountain! a hobbit hole!) and I'm so glad I got to see it again.

We also went to Cultural Cloth in Maiden Rock, WI, which is a delightful store that sells fair trade fabric and crafts, mostly by women, from around the world. I got a new throw and pillows for the couch, which sorely needed some new coverings. We ate pie in Stockholm at Stockholm Pie and visited several shops. We went to the Castlerock Museum and had a fine time, as well as visiting various places on the main drag through town. We did a side trip down to Winona to see the Minnesota Marine Arts Museum, which was a marvel, and checked out a local used book shop, a comic shop and a farm to table cafe. Definitely going back!

The next day was supposed to include a trip to Lark Toys, the Eagle Center in Wabasha and lunch at Reed's Landing, but one of my friends got word of a family health emergency and we had to cut the trip short. But it was still a delightful weekend! Conversation, jigsaw puzzles, watching things, reading and generally much-needed relaxing. Now let's hope our pal gets good news to wrap things up.

This time for, well, surviving! Advice that small press publishers founded in the last 8 years (that are still around) pass along to those who would join their number - here. Some weeks, surviving seems like the whole of the game.

It's been lively! The PEN panel went well last week, as did 13 Gears Steampunk last weekend. And our reading on Thursday night at DreamHaven. What's next, you ask? Well, I'm taking a tiny vacation and going off with friends to visit the Castlerock Museum in Alma, Wisconsin (kitties and house will be tended by their latest minion). But lots of work to get done before then! And afterwards! I've also taken on a few new projects that I'm excited about, but have to vaguebook about for the moment.

How are things apart from all that? Jana's not doing particularly well and I have to just resign myself to some aspects of that. I'm...tired. 3 events in row, plus starting a new job and trying to balance Queen of Swords Press projects has been draining. I'm hoping to get to a better balance here soon. Gradual house clean out continues slowly along too, so there's that. I'm loving "The Completely Made-Up Adventures of Dick Turpin" on Apple and "Renegade Nell" on Disney and I'm looking forward to this bit of utter ridiculousness: Borderlands. And lots more events coming up! Stay tuned!

Brief post, to be followed by a longer one later this week. I got moved to another department at the same company, so still employed, albeit with much less chance to rest and get organized than I hoped for. Did a panel this week for the Professional Editors Network and thought it went well Just back from 2 days tabling at 13 Gears Steampunk, which was fun. Next up, I read at DreamHaven Books on Thursday with Michael Merriam and Jennie Goloboy. Come see us!

It's layoff time again. Budget cuts. So my job ends next week due to budget cuts, thereby wrapping up the last 3 months as...remarkable in many ways. Even by my standards. I am admittedly very, very tired so rest would be good. What will "rest" look like, you ask? Well, I'm taking an online developmental editing class to brush up on my skills and will be open to editing/coaching/creating marketing plans, etc. in a couple of weeks. I have a novel to finish drafting. I have some classes and articles to propose. I have to finish getting Melissa Scott's Astreiant series ready to go out this year. We just got a table at Twin Cities Pride, which is huge. I want to sell off a bunch of stuff and clear things out so I can get a housemate or sell the place off, if I need to. I've been going to workshops on publishing for two years and there's a bunch of stuff I want to try. So we'll see how all that goes. But I'm feeling very "seize the day" right now and if not now, when? Fingers crossed and stay tuned!

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Dwelling in Probabilities

Catherine Lundoff's blog

Entries tagged with personal update

April has been a lot already

Updates and such

Emerging...

Driveby posting

Small victories

Uncertain times

Where in the World is Catherine?

Odds and ends

Catching Up...or something

The very definition of a “mixed bag”

The other updates...

Catching up again, book sales and trip planning

New month, who dis?

June's fun and excitement continues

Where to begin...

News and updates

Back from vacation!

Queen of Swords Press is in Publishers Weekly! Again!

Checking in...

Here we go again...