Dwelling in Probabilities

1.
The darkest part of the year is always the hardest to remember to, like, be a person and not just curl up being grumbly about the long cold dark.

But, well, I do feel more like a person the more I act like a person and interact with people, as much as I might wish to be a lump and zone out while watching streams/tv that ask nothing of me.


2.
Yuletide revealed works!

There was perhaps 30min of AHHHH about 20min after reveals due to an Ao3 bug that revealed creators alongside works. Considering that this happened to Battleship this summer and the mods heard crickets from Support at the time, perhaps now that Yuletide hit the same bug (and solved the immediate problem with advice from the Battleship mods) Ao3 support will have more data and motivation to figure out wtf happened there and make sure it can't happen again.

Anyway, I received two Yuletide gifts:

The Promise (1222 words) by Anonymous
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Oathsworn (Actual Play Podcast)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Relationships: Dorado the Adamant & Nabain Palisade
Characters: Dorado the Adamant, Nabain Palisade
Additional Tags: and the absence of Serikali, Post canon, Missing Scene, Dialogue Heavy, Major Spoilers
Summary:

“Did you ever speak to Serikali?” Dorado asked.

“Not as often as I would have liked.” The broken promise settled over his shoulders like a yoke. But even under that weight, he still could carry curiosity. Dorado was direct: if she changed topic, there had to be a reason.

This is for a fandom that, as the author's note says, I wrote a promo post last year (and then mentioned again during Battleship season when people were asking about good actual play podcasts), and am thus inevitably the reason this person got into the show. <3 Delightful to get a gift for it! I was not expecting one, but also when I saw a gift show up for me and no fandoms I'd requested in the collection list I was like "omg... perhaps..." and it was!

This is a lovely little coda adding into the Oathsworn epilogue, about what people are willing to do for the sake of their community and what secrets they're willing to keep and why. Absolutely delightful.


The other gift is WORLDBUILDING VIA TEXTBOOK EXCERPTS

The Dresediel Lex Project And Its Consequences (2385 words) by Anonymous
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Craft Sequence - Max Gladstone
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Characters: Maestre Gerhardt
Additional Tags: Worldbuilding, Epistolary
Summary:

Excerpts from documents found in Tara Abernathy's bag before her graduation from the Hidden Schools, sketching out the historical project to understand undeath and some pertinent later findings.

aka, someone taking me up on my Worldbuilding and Atypical Narrative Stuff things. <3 Absolutely delightful. A+ look into how weird it is to do SCIENCE to the magic of Becoming A Lich and Living Forever As An Undead Being. The change in thought about said magic from the first excerpt to the last is very fun, and it's a good look at a bit of magic that the series itself takes rather for granted.


I have also received absolutely lovely comments on both of the fics I wrote for Yuletide! Further commentary about those after author reveals; I had a great time writing both of them for very different reasons. xD <3


3.
Been thinking about projects for the new year and things I want to do and how, as much as I'm like "ughhhhh I am TIRED all the time" it is annoyingly true that often if I do things anyway I will end up having more energy overall.

So.

Fundamentally I believe in my ability to Write Stuff so long as I, y'know, actually focus and put time into it. xD The part where I need to get myself to actually write instead of zoning out on the internet is the hard part, usually! But I would like to actually write about the blorbos I've been rotating in my head since this summer.

There's this part of me like "that would be easier if you had a TITLE for it" and I'm like "OKAY SO GIVE ME ONE" about it. (tavina most of the time I do not feel your pain about this BUT IN THIS CASE it feels weirdly true, considering that my brain can give me the primary arc of the story and the vibes I want but the idea of WRITING it is somehow ???. if a title helps I will sigh loudly but also be like "yeah okay sure".)

but I would like to be able to actually explain about my blorbos and their not-romance (it is an ADVENTURE STORY and they are absolutely Together but also get mad if one's like "so your BOYFRIEND" about it) (they are a half-triton/half-elf and a half-orc/half-dragon because why be Normal about your multiracial fantasy characters) (the half-dragon gets kidnapped to build an airship and that's what kicks the whole thing off) which means I need to WRITE IT

so really if I have any goal for next year it is probably simply "please actually write full draft of that <3", which, to be clear, is Very Doable based on how many words I am capable of writing xD just gotta make them words about this.


4.
It snowed the day after Christmas (or, well, the evening of Boxing Day into the early morning of the 27th), fluffy dry snow that's perfectly aesthetic and wasn't too much of a pain to clean off. Tonight it's supposed to be FREEZING RAIN, however, which is so much more UGH and is going to make going to work tomorrow Special. (I wish I got more time off for the holidays, but, whatever, it's not like I would do anything in particular except rest and read and write.)


5.
The dojo did get a new heater in. It's the same as the old heater, I'm pretty sure, except newer and thus works properly. xD


6.
A friend made me watch the first four episodes of I Am Nobody, a cdrama that they were like "I think you'll like it!" about because of the traits: Has Women (aka: is not actually a BL) and Is Modern Cultivation (because I'd made a comment about the Legend of Xiao Hei that they should've told me it was modern cultivation and not just "it has a cute cat! look at the cute cat!"). The thing is, it has women by virtue of being Probably Het (I think fandom is mostly like BUT BOYS about it) and the modern cultivation is "secret sects keep magic secret" and not the far more interesting "magical cultivation sects are integrated into everyday modern life" that Xiao Hei included.

So like... it's a show that I'd have fun watching with them, because it's honestly really well done for what it is, but unlike either friend I was watching with (either the one showing this to us or the other one new to it) I am not compelled to watch the rest on my own? It leans too much into comedy and not enough into the sort of worldbuilding or character dynamics that actually get their claws into me. Not a bad thing about it, really! I see why people like it! Just. Not as much my jam as that friend had hoped for.


7.
I watched del Toro's Frankenstein on Christmas Day, and spent the entire time talking with my friend about the use of color in that movie. It definitely understood what Frankenstein (the novel) was about! It portrayed The Themes (consequences of one's actions; accepting responsibility; the relationship between creator and creation) very well. It also did not shy away from gore and blood and the surgical nature of it all! (Also there were wolves that Did Not Act Like Wolves At All but also they're A Metaphor in the end so... whatever..) Very enjoyable, glad to have seen it!